When you think back to your own childhood, what do you remember most? Do you remember play dates, swimming with friends, outings with your mum, playing in the garden with your siblings…? Or do you remember music lessons, and extra tuition and not having time to play with your siblings and friends?
As parents we all want the very best for our children – the best education, sporting achievements, a rounded skill set – in order for them to be high achievers, and get the top jobs when they finish university. So after the school day we sign them up for more lessons - Ballet, Gymnastics, Swimming, Mandarin, Maths, English, French, Piano, Art, Tennis…The list goes on. After a full day at school followed by their afternoon activities, they then have homework. And usually by the time they finish their homework it’s time for bed. When do they fit in time to just play; to just be children? Why are we so keen for them to grow up so fast?
It was a relief for me recently to receive an email from the Principal of my daughters’ school on the subject of homework. He had obviously received enquiries from worried parents about the lack of homework and wanted to shed some light on the school’s stance vis-à-vis the relevance of homework. In his letter he said that there is no evidence that homework improves a child’s academic performance. He continues to say that the school believes it’s much more beneficial for the children to participate in sport, music, drama and just socialising…
…”Just socialising…” Let’s not forget the importance of social skills. There’s little point in developing your child’s academic performance whilst ignoring his or her social development. Chances are that even with the most glowing academic references, an adult who lacks social skills probably won’t get that top job…He would just be a misfit.
So how do we develop and encourage our childrens’ social skills? The answer is through FREE PLAY. Allowing them to use their imagination to design their own games, with their own sets of rules. Learning how to make friends and include others in their games. It is through free play and role play games that children develop rationality, compassion, empathy, and they learn without the input of an adult how to solve their own problems. Emotional development won’t be encouraged through more academia, yet it is an equally important part of growing up and becoming a healthy adult.
So take a step back and review your child’s life. Is it too structured? Does he or she have time for free play and to socialise with other children and adults? If not, perhaps this is something you could find time for and make your child’s life less hectic. We all need a break sometimes. We all need to just hang out with friends every now and then. Our children do too. Let’s give them some fun childhood memories filled with friends and laughter and help them grow up with a full set of life skills!
The Art of Free Play. Are our kids lives too scheduled?